True Story.

A few weeks ago I swung over to the local mall. My goal was simple, picking up GEARS OF WAR 2 at the local gamestop. To my dismay I was 2 days early I hadn't realized that the game wasn't being released until the Friday that week and I showed up Wednesday. So this wasn't that big of a deal, Or was it?

At that point which would have been around November fifth I had been without my Diabetes meds for about a week. Unfortunately when my blood sugar gets high I get a bit mean spirited, well I become an asshole. But Now, I KNOW this and if I learned anything from a childhood watching cartoons, it's that "Knowing is Half the Battle!"

I thought to myself, I'll grab an Iced Coffee At the Dunkin' and head home before blow my lid and do something stupid.

So I get in line at Dunkin'. There is a woman ordering two dozen doughnuts... at the mall... that the Dunkin Donut Kiosk ...AT THE FUCKING MALL!

"Breath, relax chill out."
I repeat in my head.
"Breath, relax chill out."

...And I do, I take a deep breath, I relax, and I order my Coffee.

"Large Iced Hazlenut, Four Slenda, Extra Cream."

The woman turns to me and with a straight face says. "Your crazy. that stuff will give you Cancer."

I can't believe this. "wh-wh-what?"

She continues. "that much, well any splenda, It'll give you cancer."


I tell her that I'm diabetic, and I'll take my chances, and I thank her. I'm still polite, and calm, and relaxed.

"And Seizures or epilep..."

Yeah, I yelled at her. But I got my coffee. =)

Thanxgiving

So every year I think about what exactly I have to be thankful for. This year... Well this year it was a little tougher to come up with a list, what with the Lay off, the loosing my insurance, and my families growing dependencies. The fact is, no matter how many junkies there are or how little diabetes pills I don't have. There is always somethings to be thankful for.

My friends, who are a welcome replacement for a family in this city.





That the ZOMBIE Apocalypse has yet to begin.


That when it does CHUCK NORRIS is still alive to deal with it.







And of course.

Not having RAMEN at Thanksgiving dinner.

I don't care How just your cause is...

     Listen, I respect your right to gather, to tie up traffic, to protest, to get your message out there any way you can. anyway that is EXCEPT for hounding me to take a flier. I told you I didn't want one, I told you I wasn't interested and still you stuffed that stupid fluorescent green piece of paper in my hand. Now I really do wish you had been trying to save the planet by handing me a dead tree, but I honestly wasn't listening to you well enough to find out.

     Also I'm sorry if you were embarrassed when I crumpled the pamphlet and threw it in your face, I am also shocked that the cop standing right there, made YOU pick it up at the threat of a citation for littering. That's fucked up. Maybe if you had been pissing and moaning about the abuse of power the Cambridge police exhibit, I would have been more interested in your cause... Well, probably not, you see I was on my way to get coffee. I'm a bit of a brute without my coffee in the morning.

Civil Protection

Civil Protection - Halloween Safety


Civil Protection - Episode 1: Friday

This Looks Fun

Every September Union Square (somerville, ma) celebrates the invention of Marshmallow Fluff  by local resident Archibald Query in 1917.  As part of this year's festival. learn the story behind one of the festivals most beloved (not to mention Superhero) characters FLUFF BOY!

In this 32-page full scale comic book, Somerville graphic artists tell how Jimmy, a sweet youth from Union Square, is transformed into FLUFF BOY superhero and through many struggles struggles comes to terms with his new sticky superpowers.

My Zombie ate my Homework.

I was a shitty student. I made it through high school by a combination of not giving a shit, and having a uncanny ability to remember things I am told. A more accurate statement would be that I remember things I hear, I rarely took notes and NEVER did homework, and was still able to do well on tests based on my memory. Doing well on tests and getting shit marks for not doing homework stuck me with a "skin o' my teeth" passing grade. I actually had to scramble to pass my last English class, without that credit I would not graduate or at least have to do summer school.

I wound up writing a short story entitled "My Zombie ate my Homework." It was awful, It was an attempt to explain why I had never handed in a paper to her all year, all the while trying to be funny enough to distract her from the fact that my grammar knowledge was non existent. It didn't work. I got a 68% as a grade, and I narrowly avoided summer school.

The most ironic thing is that my "legendary" memory has completely failed me at to the content of that short story.

Marching to the Beat of a Different Drummer..

Unfortunately, your Drummer Keeps Shitty Time. Long story short, it's rough knowing your Sister is a Junkie

10 Tips on Getting a job at a Comic Shop

1. Forget looking in the "Help Wanted" section of your local paper, it's not gonna happen. Instead check the obituaries and police blotter.

2. You can try walking in and asking, but chances are your gonna be talking to the owner who is there because he can't afford employees, or it's an employee will shoot you down right away fearing you are "out to get" his or her position.

3. Write a creative resume and doodle on it, then forget it at home because no one will ask for one.

4. Do not apply to the shop you buy comics at, in other words don't "Shit in your own backyard". Chances are those folks at the shop you frequent, they have opinions of you. Good or bad it's better to start with a clean slate.

5. Let's suppose you actually got an interview. DO NOT wear a comic themed t-shirt. Assuming that wearing what you want is the wrong approach, on the other hand show up in a tie and your gonna get made fun of, probably to your face and definitely when you leave.

6. Be a girl

7. Avoid droning on about your favorite comics, even if asked DO NOT elaborate on how much of a "Buffy" fan you are or how you think that "Aqua-man" could take the hulk in a fair fight.

8. Avoid trying to connect with the interviewer, he or she doesn't want to hear about how much of a travesty Fox's cancelation of "Firefly" was or how bad "League of Extraordinary Gentleman" is. Besides they already know.

9. Be good at something, and be reliable. Chances are if you have to count on your fingers and have trouble reading, your screwed. However even if you are a wiz with numbers and can tell the difference between "there", "their" and "they're" It not worth a lick of good if you can't get to work on time.

10. The most important tip for getting a job at a comic shop, the one and only, sure fire way. Open your own...

...and hire a girl.

~Lou